Just for today I am enough or is it just for today am I enough? Am I enough for the people around me, for the people in my life, the people that I come across in my environment, the workplace, elsewhere? Appearances are important, for the most part they are to many people, but appearances and the lack thereof can also be willful and deceiving.
I have recently been experiencing what can only be described as a slump period. I sleep all day, usually until the afternoon. I get up at odd hours in the night and have difficulty falling asleep. On and off this will occur, and over the years I have gotten used to it. During the winter months especially when Seasonal Affective Disorder is on the rise because of poor light and because it is too cold to do anything really. I long to write, to read, to erase boredom out of my mind, to do anything really, to keep busy, active, find meaning in daily activities and chores. Oh, I know it won’t last forever. I am the magnificent comeback kid but there are a few coping mechanisms that I have adhered to over the years.
- Sometimes you just have to do what you like. Pick up a book and read it back to front for example. I don’t mean that literally. I mean, you can still find meaning by reading it chapter by chapter or by reading random pages and still find your way back to the beginning. Sometimes depression and sadness doesn’t have to make sense or how you recover from it. You make up the rules as you go along, consult books, talk to other depression sufferers, find a support group, even if it is one other trusted friend that you can tell your secrets to and can confide in.
- Find a hobby and lose yourself exquisitely in it. Find its wonder and praise it. For example, I bake and cook now. I am not by any means a professional chef but I know how to throw together a home-cooked meal for four in an evening.
- Animals and pets are important, especially their unconditional love and the tender loving care offered by man’s best friend. My dogs are important to me, caring for them, looking after their needs reminds them that I too need looking after and that oftentimes when self-love and self-care is missing from my life it can affect them.
- Communication is key. Talking and engaging with other people and not being isolated for fear you’ll stand out or that you’re the outsider in a family is one issue that keeps on keeping up for me. I don’t know why it is that I have deep trust issues, that I sometimes fear talking to a professional about my problems. The stigma of mental illness is something that I am afraid of, ashamed of although sometimes there are days when I can move on with the rest of my life and go about my day and find activities to do.
- You can overcome depression with intent. We all have good days and bad days. That’s alright. It’s okay. That’s not the end of the world. Just keep telling yourself that and sometimes that is all that it takes.